Inside The Victory Project
James Corden is Banned From This Newsletter
Once, in college, our university president attempted to “just yell STOP at racism” and although White Woman of the Year Sylvia Burwell could not stop racism at American University, I’m hoping she can just yell STOP at the cast of Don’t Worry Darling.
I can’t seem to get a pulse on when all of the drama circling this movie and its cast should stop being talked about. It does indeed seem like this week will NOT be the week we stop the chit chat, but good god I have to hope it ends soon.
The headliner this week is luckily focused more on Olivia Wilde, her ex Jason Sudeikis, their former nanny, and the world’s most famous salad. Let’s start it here: on Monday, a bombshell DailyMail article was published detailing the last few months of the relationship between Olivia and Jason. Their former nanny decided to go public with text messages and detailed accounts of Fall 2021, when the downfall of Olivia and Jason was really set in motion.
What we learned from this giant exposé is as follows:
The timeline of when Olivia/Jason split and Olivia/Harry began is a LOT unclear
Olivia (allegedly) made up rumors that Florence and Harry were hooking up in order to convince Jason that she wasn't pursuing/interested/with Harry
The nanny was caught in the fucking MIDDLE and Olivia did not do much to help the woman OUT
Nothing really brings together a nasty divorce quite like your former nanny exposing your texts and secrets for the whole world, cue JOINT STATEMENT FROM OLIVIA AND JASON.
It seems like Jason and Olivia both have some,,,things to work through internally and with a very experienced therapist - Stars they’re just like us!
The star of this show is not Olivia, Jason, or even the nanny for that matter. It’s the salad and its dressing. One day, Olivia made a salad. Seems routine. Until you consider the salad is on its way to one Mr Harry Styles and she’s also preparing her "special salad dressing” to take with it. This seems to hit a nerve with Jason who then lays down in front of Olivia’s car so she can’t take this salad dressing to Harry. As Jason puts in a text to the nanny:
In the words of Eliza from Survivor: Micronesia, “It’s a Fucking Salad Dressing”.
And to make things even better, the woman herself, Olivia Wilde, supposedly posted the recipe of the salad dressing to her instagram Tuesday night. But nothing too detailed, just a picture of the book it’s from, Heartburn by Nora Ephron.
The most upsetting thing about all of this is that it has overshadowed the absolutely bonkers U-Turn Olivia has taken regarding the sex scenes in Don’t Worry Darling. Famously on August 24th, 2022, Olivia detailed in an interview with Variety the importance of seeing women - primarily Florence Pugh - experience sexual pleasure in a blockbuster movie like this. She lauded the fact that “only women come in this movie”. She put the whopping five minutes of sex scenes at the forefront of the narrative.
Florence pushed back against this arguing that having the most famous man in the world (Harry Styles) go down on her takes away from the whole point and art of the movie and acting in general. Fast forward to just a few days ago and Olivia suddenly agrees with Miss Flo. In an interview with Elle on the 13th, Olivia says that the sex scenes actually overshadowed the rest of the movie. Girl!! What is going on!! Either her PR team has had a massive reshuffling in the last six weeks or we’re simply trying to rewrite the narrative like it’s 1984 or something.
Check On The Swifties In Your Life This Week
Last week was a pretty big week of music releases with Tove Lo and the 1975 releasing fairly impressive albums. But, for all of our favorite Conspiracy Theory adjacent girlies, this week is THE fucking super bowl: it’s Midnights release week for Miss Taylor Swift.
Look, I’m not gonna speak on the album or Taylor, these stans are doing ENOUGH of that already. By the simple nature of me being gay and liking pop music I have found myself on the edges of SwiftTok and let me tell you I am scared. Fellow Substack publication Embedded wrote about how scarily close some of our closest Swiftie friends are to major conspiracy theorist levels of mania. Check that out here.
Long story short, I am anxious about this release. I fear for what may happen if the endless theories from Swifties aren’t validated. These stans have the power to topple pretty much anyone they set their sights on.
Also don’t forget that pop queens Meghan and CRJ are releasing this week :)
James Corden: Go HOME
The other big news has been about everyone’s (least) favorite hip-thrusting-in-a-mouse-costume-late-night-host James. We are SO close to him maybe going back to the U.K. once his show finishes airing later this year. But for now, we’ll have to just settle for him getting banned (and then unbanned) from popular upscale New York restaurant Balthazar because Surprise! he doesn't treat the staff kindly. (If you don’t know about Balthazar than you have the lucky life of never watching one of these New York “restaurant review” girlie’s TikToks)
Owner Keith McNally initially banned James from Balthazar - calling him a “tiny Cretin of a man” - for him being repeatedly nasty to staff about some of the most inconsequential things. We as a culture were stunned and elated! Someone is both exposing him AND punishing him for his actions, thank god! Then, Keith posted on Monday that he had lifted the ban on James after a phone call where he apologized for his behavior. I’m like babes! A little Too Little Too Late (By JoJo) don’t ya think??
To make things better and also really draw out this story, owner Keith posted on Tuesday about how strange it made him feel, but “he was definitely abusive to my staff, on the other hand, I feel really sorry for him right now.” Keith baby!! He’s a rich British celebrity he has PLENTY of other restaurants that he can go to don’t feel sorry for him!!! Anyways, James is now allowed at Balthazar, but we now have all of these fun stories of him just being an ass - even to his own wife and child - so that’s fun!
$5 Movie Tuesdays: The Woman King
Okay this was an easy choice this week, it is a fucking slæ. My biggest note on it overall is that it is over two hours long (2:15 to be exact), but I’ll allow it. It’s also one of the few movies I’ve ever done so much research on. Like, as soon as I left the theater I just HAD to know more. Viola Davis is obviously incredible in it (required watching is her Hot Ones Interview) and it’s insane that she does all of her own stunts. Like five hours of training everyday and an insane schedule in general. It is a true action movie and she absolutely crushes it.
The plot is slightly predictable at times, but I think that is just the nature of an action movie with this pretty clearly outlined historical tie-in. A few twists here and there made it something I was enGAGED in for every second. I saw it in an empty theater and I was reacting. Like fully crouching in my seat, yelling at the screen, having the time of my life.
I was a little disappointed to see that a significant chunk of the writing was done by a few white women - Gina Prince-Bythewood is the director and a Black woman and Viola Davis is also at the forefront, but the writing and initial premise began with a couple white women’s interest in Dahomey. However, it still does a great job of highlighting some really great actors from a mix of South African, Ugandan, Nigerian, British, and American backgrounds. They also made a point of pushing for local crew and artists in order to continue to focus on Black people, talent, and stories. It’s a movie that is the first of its kind out of Hollywood and truly does an incredible job. Overall, it’s a really great movie and I think it’ll provide a great jumping off point for a lot of the lesser known actors and crew who were able to breakout in these roles.
Culture Roundup
Lisa Rinna Gets Booed at BravoCon
Lizzo’s VanityFair Lie Detector Interview
Wendy Williams Update!!
This week’s playlist is essentially just new Tove Lo (Album Of The Year??), The 1975, and Fred Again.. Also, justice for SG Lewis. Nothing more to say there.
Okay so I currently live in an insanely unfurnished apartment in Seattle, but we’re having a blast so life is pretty good!! As I continue in this brief period of unemployment I might try out sending more frequent newsletters whenever I can find some spare time. Maybe some culture deep dives, album reviews, who is to say really!
xx
i’m making that salad dressing peter